Let’s be honest, when most people hear the term “basketball wife” or “girlfriend,” a very specific, often sensationalized image comes to mind. We think of the glamorous sidelines, the designer handbags, the dramatic reality TV moments. I’ve been around this world long enough, both as an observer and through professional connections, to know that this glittering facade is just one tiny piece of a much more complex, and often pressurized, puzzle. The real lives of these women are stories of profound adaptation, silent support, and navigating a unique form of public scrutiny that few professions demand of partners. It’s a world where a simple trade, a sudden move, can uproot an entire family’s life overnight, a reality underscored by transactions like the one that brought a Fil-Am player to Rain or Shine in 2022 in a trade with Phoenix for Javee Mocon. That single line in a sports report represents a seismic shift in someone’s personal life.

Think about that for a moment. A player is traded, and the news focuses on team strategy and athletic potential. But behind that headline, there’s a partner who might have just settled into a community, a family that enrolled kids in a new school, a life built in one city that now needs to be packed up and reassembled in another, often with very little notice. The pressure to be the stable, supportive anchor through this chaos is immense. I’ve spoken to women who describe the constant state of “readiness,” of having their lives perpetually in semi-packed boxes, both literal and metaphorical. The financial security is often there, sure, but it’s traded for geographic instability and a career that is always, always secondary to his. I remember one conversation with a longtime WAG—she joked that her own resume had become a map of rental properties across three different countries. It was a funny line, but her eyes told the real story of fragmented professional identity and the struggle to maintain her own ambitions.

And then there’s the public eye. My goodness, the scrutiny. Every outfit, every social media post, every moment of celebration or disappointment in the stands is dissected. They are expected to be flawless supporters, never too emotional, never too detached. The criticism can be brutal and deeply personal, often conflating a partner’s performance on the court with her worth off it. The mental toll this takes is something I believe the average fan grossly underestimates. It’s a 24/7 performance where you’re judged for being too present or not present enough. I have a personal preference for the ones who quietly carve out their own space—starting businesses, pursuing advocacy work, creating a life that has his world in it but isn’t entirely defined by it. They seem, in my observation, to fare much better. They build a resilience that isn’t solely tied to the scoreboard.

This brings me back to that idea of “family” beyond biology, which is so crucial in basketball culture. The note about the Fil-Am player feeling grateful to be welcomed into the “Rain or Shine family” isn’t just PR fluff. That sense of belonging extends, in the best cases, to the partners and children. A supportive team environment can be a lifeline for a WAG in a new city. I’ve seen how a warm welcome from other families in the organization can ease the transition, creating an instant support network of people who truly understand the unique pressures. This ecosystem can make or break the experience. When it works, it creates a buffer against the isolation; when it doesn’t, the loneliness can be acute. It’s why community-building among these women themselves is so vital—they are the only ones who truly get it.

So, what’s the real picture? It’s one of incredible resilience. It’s managing households across time zones, being a therapist after a tough loss, a celebrant after a win, a solo parent during extended road trips, and a constant target for public opinion—all while trying to remember your own name isn’t just “So-and-So’s girlfriend.” The glamour is real, but it’s the tip of the iceberg. The bulk of it, the substance, is the relentless, often thankless work of building a stable life on a foundation that is inherently unstable. The next time you see a trade announcement, spare a thought for the behind-the-scenes logistics and emotional recalibration happening off the court. Their game is played in the quiet moments of transition, in the strength it takes to constantly rebuild a home, and in the grace required to do it all in the spotlight’s unforgiving glare. In my book, that deserves more than just a headline; it deserves our understanding.

LIGHTING, LIGHTING, AND MORE LIGHTING
People are typically drawn to bars solely based on their atmosphere. The best way to knock your next commercial bar design out of the park is using the perfect amount and type of lighting. Use standout light fixtures as their very own statement piece, track lighting for adjustable ambiance, hanging pendant lights over tables, and ambient backlighting to display the alcohol. Bartenders need to serve and customers need to order, so make sure it’s just functional as it is attractive. 

CHOOSING YOUR BARTOP
What may seem so obvious, is often so overlooked in commercial bar design- the material of your actual bartop itself. While we realize stone and marble are as classy and elegant-looking as can be, the reality is that they just aren’t your best option for a durable and long lasting bartop. They crack, have no grip, and break way too many glasses. Opt for a high-quality wood bar instead. Oaks, maples, mahoganies, and ashes are sturdy and provide your customers with a firm grip for their glasses. 

THEME 
In a sea of millions upon millions of bars, how can you make your commercial bar design stand apart from the rest? The answer is to pick a unique, centralized theme and run with it. Whether it’s your next sit-down restaurant bar design, or remodeling the small, locally-favorite gem, you have to find out what your clientele wants. Survey the neighborhood of your establishment and find out what the demographics are there. Maybe a gritty, western bar would be a hit. Or maybe a more modern, sleek design is what’s missing in the area. Whatever theme you decide upon, hit it out of the park with the perfect lighting, wall art, music, and furniture. It’s all in the details. 

THE GUIDE TO YOUR NEXT RESTOBAR 
You’ve got the food, you’ve got the restaurant, you’ve got the customers, now all you need is a beautifully designed bar to top it all off.  Small bar designs for restaurants have a tendency to be a little thrown together and incohesive with the rest of the establishment. Stay on brand- create consistency with tying in the same color scheme, furniture, art, and overall ambiance of the pre-existing restaurant. Make sure the placement of your bar makes sense as well, have it in a place where it’s visible and easy to navigate but not in the way of servers and other guests. If the bar is going to serve food, be sure to consider the location of the kitchen to not obstruct traffic flow. Consider all of these small tips as you work through your next restaurant bar design. 

SPACE CONSTRAINT 
It’s no secret that bars have the reputation of being a little cramped, and in some cases- way too cramped. Consider all of the space constraints while designing your next commercial bar design and we can change that bad rap that bars have been holding for far too long. First and foremost, be sure to measure your bar, barstool, cabinet, and equipment height. Generally, a bar is 42” in height while a stool is 30” in height. Also be sure to allow at least 3’ of space between the bar and the alcohol for the bartender’s functionality and efficiency. Consider multiple register and drink-making stations for bartenders as well. Allowing 2’ between patrons is going to give them enough space to eat and drink, and most importantly, simply be comfortable. All of these considerations are especially helpful if it is a restaurant bar design, where the space is even more valuable.